god bless...


she has been dwelling with her own emotions aimlessly since he came back...

myriad of questions forming at the back of her head

she misses him so much...

she wish she could hold him again...

he was her strength, her laughter, her sorrow, her everything...

he was completely uncertain of what he wanted when he came back

but she was very sure that he had absolutely no idea of what he was up to

she may be wrong but that was how she felt strongly about...

instinct seldom lies....

she wish she could be there for him now to listen to his ups and down

but who is she...?

just a stranger in his eyes....

friends...?

she does not think so...

she sees him doin just fine without her...

happier perhaps...

what they were before were meant to be history...

why must destiny brought them together in the past...?

she's clueless...

but what's certain...she holds no regret meeting him...

its hard to let go...

but life have to go on...

amin...

Solitude...

What can I say,
Now that you have,
Stopped loving me.
What can I do,
Now that you have,
Decided our love,
Should end.
Where can I go,
To stop my heart from bleeding,
To forget about you,
There is no word,
Nothing I can do,
Nowhere to go,
To relive the happiness,
With you and I.

Dreams are over,
Reality has strikes me,
Perhaps a little too soon,
Because I have never thought,
This day would come,
So soon,
So suddenly,
That my heart just breaks in two,
Thinking about you,
Thinking about how the days,
Would go on for me,
When you step out of the door.

Don’t leave me,
That all I can say,
That’s all I can think of now,
Don’t leave me,
Don’t let me stay here,
All alone,
All by myself,
Counting each seconds,
Passing by me,
Without you.
Without your love,
I can’t think,
I can’t dream,
I can’t do anything.

I know your heart has changed,
I know your love,
Has come and gone,
But I need your present,
For I can’t see the day,
Without you,
For I can’t see the night,
Without your love,
Stay with me,
Don’t leave me....

Pardon...

my most sincere apology to J.J...
i'm sorry...your wish i can't fulfill...
totally -absurd-for now...
don't blame it on you
its my fault
maybe you are right....
im being ridiculous
but im sorry...ive not move on...

****************************************************************************

my father once told me that a teacher holds E most honourable profession
NO teacher = NO doctor, NO lawyer, NO PRESIDENT.
true...
someone you look up to, u respect.
who constantly tells you to behave like an adult
and also constantly literally shouts at you right smack on the face
i didnt know that adults need to be shouted at....???
hmmm...now i know....at least not to late....
thank you teacher
see....NO teacher, NO genius....


sayonara...:)

Lacrymosa...




Out on your own
cold and alone again
can this be what you really wanted, baby?

Blame it on me
set your guilt free
nothing can hold you back now

Now that you're gone
I feel like myself again
grieving the things I can't repair and willing ...

to let you blame it on me
and set your guilt free
I don't want to hold you back now love

I can't change who I am
not this time, I wont lie to keep you near me
and in this short life, there's no time to waste on giving up
my love wasn't enough

and you can blame it on me
just set your guilt free, honey
I don't want to hold you back now love...

SUPERB!!!


17th of march, Saturday...went to IMH with Safiah....

we had so much fun...

had to wake up early in the morning at ard 7.45 am to get there....

we were still late though....haha

we painted a mural....WALAAAA....!



oh tatz me in action....hehe...:P

and we are proud to say that our hard work will have to stay there for a very long time....hehe...:)

oh yeah met my "soulmate" there....his name is Rahiman.....yeah rite...haha!!!

& oh yeah met benny in town w his gf i assume....:P

his reaction was really candid lar i tell u when he saw me...haha..:D

then i met a dear fren of mine...looking sweet lyke always....getting thinner though...

felt a sense of fulfillment when i chatted with him though not more than 20 secs...

at least i noe now that he is doing fine....

im happy for him...:)

and as for me....im doing fine too i guess...laughing like crazy bitches with Safiah...

'Kelakar sangat, sangat-sangat kelakar...SUPERB!!!'

haha....

aiyah....too long to write....

ok wait... let me copy from Safiah's blog....[saf sorry yer aku pinjam kau nye entry hehe...:D]


"Wah. Only Rahimah has the ability to make me spit out my drink and literally sat down in the middle of the pavement,laughing till I can't LOL anymore cos I'll be crying till my stomach hurts. Since sec one sia.

Damn power! "Power sangat! Sangat sangat power! Superb!"

Doesn't help both of us scaredy cats but act brave noe! We decided to walk on this dark lane. We were like already laughing our heads off over some stupid stuff when suddenly a motorcycle that just passed us went "Boom!" Siallah. Both of us were like screaming and hugging each other sia. I swear it's damn loud. Turned out one of the tyres punctured. Right timing. Kanina.

Then,after recovering from the shock,we had a good laugh.BUT. Thanks ah, right after that,this couple just had to scare us from behind.Never ring the bicycle bell noe. And yet again,Rahimah and I jumped and hugged each other while screaming. Cheebye.

Moral of the story:Scared,just admit it lah."

haha....ok....so thats what happened...:)

& o yeah...that's us in the bus....











BUBBYE!!!

random thoughtz

went to JB with mother & father yesterday

i mizz them

it has been ages since we last spent our time together

we ate like pig

haha


13th march 07
went out with safiah...

she took pictures while throwing vulgarities haha

oh my god...jalan rumah tinggi...whr the hell is that???

u mean eunos int means jalan rumah tinggi???

we laugh like alwayz...

i swear the residents there are aliens

THE LIFT

haha

oh ya safiah...

we left our umbrella in the bus

boohoo!

love u gerl :)

12th march 07

went into the room with mother

father promised to tag along but he didnt

& saf got the dates mixed up

myriad of emotions rising up

if it wasnt for the cute doc & swit assistant

i would have fainted

i swear


23:28 pm...
i felt funny

i wanted to scream

actually i did


13th march...
its even more 'funnier'

but i cried instead of laughing

if only i could pass through the telephone line

what would i do then...???

hmmm...


14th march...
hooked on the phone with huda for 4 hrs

i realised something

INSTANTLY

i was stupid

VERY

she said i was the most kental girl to ever did what i did and felt what i felt

Gosh....its so true....

HA HA HA!!!

HOURGLASS


at home now with mummy

fatah just called thinking that im in sch haha

its been a long time since mummy and me had a heart to heart talk as we seldom gotta meet each other

i mizz her

i was holding back my tears

but she said it was ok to cry

she gave me a big tight hug, i felt so much better

she also said that she knew all along what was goin on around me but she just kept quiet because she believed that i am strong enough to take care of myself....

she's goin to stay 4 quite sum time until the 13th of March....my big day...:)

oh yar....chatted with seri 4 a while, im glad she's doin well with her boyfriend...haha i remembered when i met with her boyfriend around 2 months back and he was like complementing on her from head to toe thinking that it was only us that was around....but ooopzzz....hehe...how sweet...:)

time flies....6 years had passed...at 14 i met seri....we are still friends till now...

she is one strong lady whom i look up to

having a bad past, people have preconceived notion about her

always crying to me as if the world is over

but she managed to stand up tall and believe in herself

and yeah....she's happy now, with a boyfriend who really treasure her, accepts her for who she is, forgive and forget...

ill pray for her happiness...:)

as for mummy, she's my pillar...

though we seldom met, she always stay in my heart

she had went through a lot and is still standing strong

but ofcourse there was a moment where she nearly gave up, i saw how much she suffered, it was really heartbreaking to see her crying each and every single day for 5 whole month....there was nothing i could do then but to just assure her that she still have me and that i love her very much...

but she stood up back on her feet...

and always had a smile on her face now

she told me that "a smile is a curve that sets a lot of things straight"

its true....

i love u mummy...

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